Remember when you held my hand

tension_terror2 @ 2007-10-27T09:18:00

2007-10-27T13:20:01Z

It's been months and months since I've wrote in here.
I don't think I regret it.

Since I last updated, not a lot has happened, or changed.

The band season is almost over. Today is our last everything.
I'm very excited, and surprisingly sad, considering this is only my second year.

I guess it's just sort of hitting me now, that in just a few months, I'm going to have to grow up. I can't hide behind emotional problems when something doesn't get done. That just won't cut it. The work's going to get harder, and I can't just fake sick to get out of everything.

There's no more hiding. I will be completely exposed.

I'm clinging onto Phil like he's the last person on earth, not just because I love him, but because I'm scared as hell.

I want this more than anything.
But at the same time, I just want to stay forever.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-07-06T14:54:00

2007-07-06T18:55:04Z

I want to get this as soon as I turn 18. What do you think?

tension_terror2 @ 2007-05-10T17:26:00

2007-05-10T21:26:20Z

Different parts of the brain become involved when a person chooses to multitask. When the brain multitasks, a “toggling” action occurs, and the two tasks are performed separately.(1) According to a functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) study, “The switching of attention from one task to another, the toggling action, occurs in a region right behind the forehead called Brodmann’s Area 10 in the brain’s anterior prefrontal cortex.”(2) The corpus collossum, which coordinates information between the left and right hemispheres of the brain, is also involved in the process. (3) However, the brain has difficulty processing two inputs for the same sense. In order for the tasks to be performed simultaneously, a person must first prioritize and decide which task is the most important, and then switch gears and remember the “rules” for the task he or she has chosen to complete first. (4) This causes “time costs”, because the brain must spend seconds to accomplish this switch. (5) Due to the fact that “the prefrontal cortex is one of the last regions of the brain to mature and one of the first to decline with aging, young children do not multitask well, and neither do most adults over 60.” (6) This puts teenagers in a prime age for multitasking.
As technology has changed and advanced, multitasking has become commonplace. Cell phones, iPods, text messaging, chat rooms, and web sites such as Facebook and Myspace have been introduced, gearing today’s generation towards multitasking. (7) Possibly the most influential source is the computer. The personal computers of today have grown a great deal in popularity, and a survey done by Donald Roberts shows that “In 1990, the majority of adolescents said the one medium they couldn’t live without was a radio/CD player…In a 2004 follow-up, the computer won hands down.” (8) This increase in popularity lead to a study done by the Pew Internet Project, which concluded that “Young people are engaging in computer-based multitasking, as well as more general multitasking while using media.” (9)
Multitasking alters brain functioning, which consequently affects learning, especially amongst the youth. A recent study showed that “when a single area of the brain…has to do two things at once…there is less brain activation than occurs when it watches one thing at a time.”(10) Also, “neuroscience studies have shown that different parts of the brain are involved in learning when a person focuses all of their attention on a single chore.” (11) This can be dangerous when related to teenagers and studying. According to a Los Angeles Times/Bloomburg Poll, “53 percent of kids 12-17 did at least one other thing [sic] while studying, while 21 percent performed three other tasks simultaneously.” (12) As previously mentioned, multitasking involves making a mental priority “list”. The multitasking involved when studying at a computer involves instant messaging (IM) conversations, which the teen may choose to focus on first, instead of their homework. Some students even say that they write a sentence while their e-mail is loading, or while they are waiting for a friend to respond in an IM. (13) Another problem involved with multitasking while studying is the “rule changing” task, previously mentioned.

“For example, a student who has completed her math homework and is ready to begin

her English homework must first decide that she is done with math and ready to begin

English (goal shifting) and then turn off the rules of addition and multiplication and

activate the rules for reading a store (rule activation).” (14)

Not only is studying while multitasking time consuming, but the information that is learned is “more superficial, inflexible, and concrete.” (15) Consequently, if a student obtains a new skill while multitasking, he or she will have difficulty being able to apply that skill in various ways later on. (16)

When students multitask, they cause their homework to take considerably longer, affecting both their grades and their social lives. Studies have shown that “for all types of tasks, subjects lost time when they had to switch from one task to another, and time costs increased with the complexity of the task.” (17) Stawar estimates that “over the long run, the time required to make these switches may lead to a 20 to 40 percent decrement in actual productivity.” (18) Dr. David Meyer reasons that the additional time needed comes from the brain’s necessity to switch between tasks, creating a lag time, or “time costs” which add up depending on how long a person is multitasking. (19) According to Keifer, “Skill acquisition involves progressing from slow, deliberate processing to [sic] fast, automated processing.” (20) Teenagers who multitask while studying accumulate time costs, forcing them to spend longer on their homework, and consequently feel rushed. By rushing through these steps, teenagers may be sacrificing valuable time needed in order to learn the skill. And although the student may be communicating with friends while studying, the interactions are less social than they would be in person. “If you’re IMing four friends while watching That 70’s Show, it’s not the same as sitting on the couch with your buddies or your sisters and watching the show together.” (21)

Valuable social skills are lost due to teenager’s preference to multitask, especially with the rise of Massively Multiplayer Online (MMO) games, which are attributing to the multitasking craze. Time magazine recently wrote a story which documented the life of an average American family. When the children’s parents arrived home from work, they were rarely even acknowledged, due to the fact that the daughter was talking to friends online, and the son was playing video games. (22) Because they were so caught up in their media multitasking, the family did not sit down together for a meal. (23) This has become commonplace in American homes. When teenagers multitask, especially with video games, they tend to focus solely on the game. (24) However, they are still multitasking within the game. Games such as World of Warcraft, an MMO, offer various tasks that can and usually are intended to be completed simultaneously. Within the game, quests that are given are usually intended to be completed while finishing another quest, in order to save time and gain reputation with different factions at the same time. At any point while completing these “quests”, players are able to interact with other players through a messaging system similar to IMs. (25) This “habitual multitasking may condition [players] minds to an overexcited state, making it difficult to focus even when they want to,” for tasks such as homework or common conversation. (26)

Several risks are associated with excessive and frequent multitasking. Multitasking allows teenagers to procrastinate, which gives them less time to complete the original task, increasing stress and anxiety when the student must finish the assignment. (27) According to Shellenburger, “Chronic high-stress multitasking also is linked to short-term memory loss.” (28) Not only is short term memory damaged, but “intense multitasking can induce a stress response, an adrenaline rush that when prolonged can damage cells that form new memory,” making future learning more difficult.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-04-18T18:20:00

2007-04-18T22:24:07Z

What makes it worse is when, it's all your fault.
And you could fix it.
But you don't think it could make you feel better.
Or all you want is instant gratification.
Or you've got addictions.

And you wonder whether or not you're making the right decision. Wonder if you only act the way you do to spite another. And at the same time, you don't even care about any of that.
You want to face your problems. But you hide from them. And you've watched it happen to so many other people. People in your family. And it scares you. And it makes you sick. And it makes you sort of feel like dying.

And then there are moments where you are free. And happy. And sometimes it's natural. But those moments are rare, and some come with a bite. Because you're only happy because of living in the past.

And then you escape. And it's just a facade. And it's all a lie you tell yourself to get by on. And you know that when you wake up, all that will have happened, is that you've let your life go on around you. And the people that once cared about you...well, they don't. And you want to be angry with them. But you really don't have a right to be. Because you did it to yourself.

That's what it all comes back to. All the misery you put yourself through. You caused it. You could have stopped it. And now you've complicated it. And you're expected to know what you want. But you can't. You never can.

Replace all the you's with me's and I's and first person pronouns. You just feel pathetic typing it out as if it's your life.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-04-09T16:48:00

2007-04-09T20:46:34Z

I played World of Warcraft for 12 hours yesterday.
I got my dungeon 3 gloves and a new staff.
I need to be shot.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-04-04T17:27:00

2007-04-04T21:25:54Z

Yesterday was such an awesome night, you don't even know.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-04-04T06:33:00

2007-04-04T10:40:52Z

To follow the trend...

20 things that I want to say to people but don't. Ask and I'll confirm/deny. If you don't want it posted, IM me.

1. You're really not as great as you think you are. If you were just a little more humble, people might like you more.

2. I'm glad we never dated. It would have complicated things so much, but I still wish we could hang out more.

3. Despite what you think, I don't flirt with your boyfriend. He flirts with me.

4. You have been a bigger part of my life than anyone. No matter what happens, you will always have a part of me, and I will always, always love you.

5. I really miss you too much to even say. I don't know if you realize how much I enjoyed spending time with you when we were younger. You've just got so many friends, and so much going on in your life, that I really feel like you don't have time for me.

6. Stop trying so hard to be up on everyone's life, and pretending like you do drugs. It doesn't make you cool.

7. My feelings towards you are constantly changing. I will pretend to be okay with everything, but it still kills me, and I don't think I've fully forgiven you. Maybe I can in time.

8. You never fail to confuse me. I'm never sure if you're my friend or not. No, I don't get along with your group of friends, and I get sick of you picking them over me every single time.

9. I am really glad we started talking again. I almost forgot how much fun you are.

10. You are so goddamn intense. I absolutely love talking to you, and can't wait till we hang out. EDIT: I LOVED hanging out with you. =]

11. You create your own drama, and it's stupid. Stop doing things that you know are going to upset other people then ask for sympathy, and get mad when you don't get it. It's irritating.

12. You're pretty, but not drop dead gorgeous. Constantly posting pictures of yourself makes you look stuck-up, narcissistic, and vain. Also, the strange faces you make are unattractive.

13. You used to dislike me, I think. I've never been sure how you feel towards me. I think we're on good terms now, but we hang out with totally different people, and I doubt we'll ever talk after you graduate.

14. Your goofy attitude is not funny. Most of the time, I find you cruel and stupid, and I really don't think you can sing at all. You play off of other people's embarrassment, and I can't stand you for it, even if everyone else adores you.

15. I have absolutely no respect for you whatsoever. Be loyal to your friends, or you don't deserve to have them. And you definitely don't.

16. Honestly, you were one of my best friends. I don't know what the hell has happened to you. Stop messing around with my other friend's emotions. It's really shitty, and he doesn't deserve it. If you don't want to be with him, leave, but don't expect him to not hang out with me because you're jealous.

17. It feels really weird to say it, but in a way, I love you. Not the kissy way, more like philos. You've been there with me through thick and thin, no matter how bad I screwed up. You've kept my secrets, and you've seen me at my highest highs and rock bottom. I don't think I've ever told you how much I really appreciate you, and I'm sorry if it seems like I take you for granted. Also, you should stop letting people walk all over you. Including me.

18. I find you to be very hypocritical. At times, I don't mind you, but for the most part I think that you're whiny, spoiled, and that you're just trying to get attention.

19. Not every guy is attracted to you. In fact, few are. And the ones that do legitimately like you, you toy with. Are you stupid? Pick one, stop flirting with all the rest. It's possibly one of the most annoying traits I have seen in anyone, ever.

20. Don't go into the army. I'll miss you so much, even if we don't talk as much as I'd like to.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-03-31T12:44:00

2007-03-31T16:43:08Z

This is the worst feeling I have ever had.
And I think I may have made a horrible mistake.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-03-19T10:47:00

2007-03-19T15:47:28Z

Chere Karissa,
Mon frere est tres terrible! Mes parents ne veulent pas qu’il habiter dans notre maison. Je suis triste. Que lui arrivera-t-il?

Triste soeur,
Chloe

Chere Chloe,
Parlez a ton frere et tes parents. Si tout le monde parle a chaque autre, votre frere sera bon.

Chere Karissa,
A l’ecole, un grand carcon est mechant. Il rit quand je tombe, et un fois, il a me frappe. J’ai parle a mes parents, mais ils ont me dit “Pleures plus!” J’ai peur. Que dois je faire?

Aidez-moi!
Michael

Chere Michael,
Parlez a ta prof. Elle peut aider-vous. Ta prof peut raisonne avec le garcon, et il serai gentil. S’il est mechant, allez une autre piece.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-03-19T10:29:00

2007-03-19T15:29:48Z

Every person has a story to tell. David Sedaris, author of his memoir, Naked, has seventeen. This memoir would be enjoyed by those who appreciate quirky tales told with sharp wit and humour. However, Naked is not a book for young audiences, as it contains swearing, drug use, and some sexual situations. Sedaris’ stories are full of laugh out loud moments, but have enough significance to hold a reader’s attention. His cynical, self-conscious views are often endearing, and the experiences in the book are easily relatable, allowing the reader to connect with Sedaris. I have read other works by Sedaris, and happily, Naked stands up to par with his other works, which were fantastic.
Though the stories are not in chronological order, they are fairly easy to piece together. Naked narrates Sedaris’ life, from his childhood to his adult years. As a child, he suffers from severe Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (O.C.D.), which drives him to lick light switches, press his nose against scalding cars, and hit himself in the head with his shoe, much to the dismay of his teachers. He was raised with his sister, Lisa, father, alcoholic mother, and slightly insane Greek grandmother. As he ages, Sedaris attends multiple colleges, occasionally dropping out to take various odd jobs, such as sorting apples and finishing wood. Because of his fear of driving, Sedaris hitchhikes wherever he needs to go, and on one occasion, he brings his paraplegic friend Veronica along for the ride. Sedaris saves the title of the book for the last chapter, where he visits a nudist colony and gains a new perspective on people and the world.
Naked is, plain and simple, hilarious. More often than not, Sedaris finds himself in highly awkward and embarrassing situations. In a chapter titled “Something for Everyone”, a college aged Sedaris accepts a job finishing wood. The woman who hires him also hires a hypocritical black man, who Sedaris never quite trusts. In the end, the man steals money from his employer while she is away. Sedaris witnesses this, and instead of stopping him, he replaces the stolen money with some of his own. During his childhood, Sedaris suffers from O.C.D. His rituals, by themselves, are not funny. The reactions of his teachers and his mother’s reactions to his teachers make the chapter “A Plague of Tics” a riot. During one class period, Sedaris recalls,
“I slipped off my shoe pretending to examine the imprint on the heel.
‘You’re going to hit yourself over the head with that shoe, aren’t you?’
It wasn’t ‘hitting’, it was tapping; but still, how had she known what I was about to do?”(8)
When his teachers come to discuss the matter with his mother, she merely offers them drinks, and challenges them to find a solution to her son’s problem.
If Sedaris’ humour does not appeal to a reader, he or she will still be interested in the stories. Sedaris’ experiences almost always end with irony or a lesson. In the chapter “Cyclops”, Sedaris tells of his father, who constantly exaggerates and makes up stories in order to prevent his children from being reckless. While he has well-meaning intentions, he often tries to protect his children unnecessarily. Sedaris father tells stories that range from stabbing a friend’s eye out with a pencil to killing someone while driving. The latter story scars Sedaris so badly that he is unable to bring himself to ever get a license. The chapter ends with Sedaris father stating, “Oh, you kids. Not one of you has got so much as a teaspoon of gumption. I don’t know where you got it from, but in the end, it’s going to kill you.” (52) Little is left to the reader’s imagination. Sedaris describes every room, every scene, and every person in perfect detail, without ever becoming tedious or boring. His daydreams are entertaining, intriguing, and descriptive, such as this image from the chapter “True Detective”.
“My mind was snagged on the thought of those jubilant silver dollars, raucous and dizzy with their first feelings of independence. I pictured their splitting into groups and traveling by night to avoid any excess attention. It might prove difficult to roll over grass and leaves, so I imagined them huddled in the carport, deciding it best to stick to the roads and sidewalks.”
Sedaris is a self-critical word-smith. His wit and sharp tongue are present in every page. He also leaves no doubt as to whom he idolizes. Sedaris’ mother is a perfect example of the wit her son inherited. When Sedaris’ Greek grandmother Ya-Ya goes to church one day, Sedaris’ father suggests that she might be making friends. Sedaris’ mother sharply responds, “Right. Then they can wolf down a few steaks at the Peddler before heading over to the discotheque. Face it, baby, it’s just not going to happen.” In the chapter “I Like Guys”, Sedaris is forced to come to terms with his sexual orientation. Even when examining himself, he never loses his sarcasm, at times becoming a bit harsh with himself.
I found myself connecting more to Sedaris’ childhood tales. Prior to reading the book, I read another work by Sedaris, entitled Me Talk Pretty One Day. I loved the book, and glanced through Naked, which seemed to have fang marks imprinted on each page, a trait common in Sedaris’ books. After reading the first few chapters, I found that I could relate to his problems with O.C.D. Later in the book, the fact becomes increasingly obvious that Sedaris’ gets anxious in most social positions, a feeling that I share with him.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-03-08T22:31:00

2007-03-08T14:50:32Z

http://www.nd.edu/~frswrite/issues/1998-1999/sp99/Walter2.shtml

http://www.ajr.org/Article.asp?id=2554

http://www.soros.org/initiatives/youth/articles_publications/articles/whatswrong_20021104

tension_terror2 @ 2007-02-14T19:42:00

2007-03-01T00:46:10Z

It's been a very, very long time since I've updated. Well, sort of. Anyway.

+ I now work at Hungry Howie's on Grosse Ile.
+ I am dating Phillip ♥
- Grease practice is going to take over my life in the next 2 weeks.
+ I got a 99% on my Advanced Bio test and it makes me smile a lot.
+ I go on adventures.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-01-22T14:43:00

2007-01-22T18:45:06Z

Karissa Baker
World literature
5th hour

1. In what ways are The Canterbury Tales humourous? Please give ample support and explanation for your points.

Every individual has his or her own sense of what is amusing. Irony, lewd humour, and people who make fools of themselves all lend a hand in making Geoffrey Chaucer’s The Canterbury Tales comic. The Reeve’s Tale tells a story that is the perfect definition of irony, and The Miller’s Tale portrays sexual humour as well as showing the general stupidity of men. While meant to prove political and social points, The Canterbury Tales hold many different grains of humour.
Irony in a story is defined as having an outcome of events contrary to what was, or might have been, expected. In The Reeve’s Tale, the miller was generally expected to get away with the two men’s grain. In the story, the reeve states “A thief he was, forsooth, of corn and meal, and sly at that, accustomed well to steal.” (2) So not only is the miller a thief, he is good at what he does, strengthening the assumption that he will succeed in stealing the food. He was also known to be a strong man who threatened death on anyone who tried to sleep with his daughter. The fact that both of his women are taken, and the men get their food back completely unscathed is the height of irony, hilarious in itself. Karma finally takes vengeance on a man so wicked and arrogant, the retribution is both satisfying and amusing.
The drunken miller who tells his story out of turn foreshadows a tale that is full of lewdness, mirroring his own personality. The lengths that the characters go to in order to sleep with each other secretly are so desperate that it is funny. Alison lies to her husband, and makes up a completely nonsensical story about a flood, which her husband believes. Absolom’s desperate attempt to win Alison’s heart serenades her outside of her window, a funny display of affection which still exists in our films today. He sings, “Dear lady, by your will, be kind to me,” while her husband is sleeping right next to her. The exchange between Nicholas and Alison’s husband is humourous due to the density of the husband. When Nicholas tells him that “in less time than an hour…every man shall drown and lose his life,” to which the husband responds, “Alas, for my wife! Alas, my Alison! And shall she drown?…But is there nothing to be done?”(1197) His wife who he loves so dearly is intending to cheat on him with Nicholas. Later, after Nicholas and Alison have been together, Absolom returns and requests a kiss from Alison. She allows him to kiss her “bare bum”, though he is not aware at first. This is crude humour in and of itself.

tension_terror2 @ 2007-01-13T14:45:00

2007-01-13T19:46:16Z

I passed my road test. ♥

tension_terror2 @ 2006-09-27T06:12:00

2006-09-27T10:10:59Z

Cruel Intentions is easily the best movie ever made. Ever.

tension_terror2 @ 2006-09-22T06:36:00

2006-09-22T10:36:21Z

So basically, I am destroyed.

tension_terror2 @ 2006-09-10T18:21:00

2006-09-10T22:21:59Z

I am gauging my ears. =)

tension_terror2 @ 2006-07-12T15:31:00

2006-07-12T22:33:08Z

Happy birthday Ally :)

tension_terror2 @ 2006-06-20T16:00:00

2006-06-20T20:01:26Z

blue eyes and sandy hair
remind me of the place,
where the brilliance of the ocean
washed over the shore.
& now the summer breeze is back once again
bringing with it
the promise of your love

tension_terror2 @ 2006-05-06T11:14:00

2006-05-06T15:19:11Z

Last night was so much fun. We had the play until like 8 30, then the cast and their signifigant others (plus a few random audience members) headed out to Applebees. We were worried there wasn't going to be enough room seeing as we hadn't accounted for the audience members, but it all worked out fine I guess. I sat with Julia, Alicia, Aleea, and Katie. Apparently Alicia is afraid of asians.
I guess there was a little drama afterwards, because there was going to be a RENT party at Steph's house. I'm pretty sure the signifigant others of the cast were kind of mad they weren't going, but it was a cast RENT party, not a cast plus everyone's girlfriend/boyfriend party. That and I was busy picking stickers off of Steph's car. The person who did it even went as far as to go inside of her car and put in stickers.
The RENT party was really fun. I wish I could've stayed the night. Got home around 1 and went to bed.

A good night.

And tonight, we go bowling!

tension_terror2 @ 2006-05-03T21:25:00

2006-05-04T01:28:33Z

This week has been horrible. I'm the most stressed I've been all year, between massive amounts of homework, play practice everyday, my family, trying to keep a social life, and spooning out pity to other stressed out people.

I'm done lying down and taking people's shit. I'm DONE. I refuse to be spoken to as if I'm a lesser person, for whatever reason. I will speak to you in a normal tone of voice so long as I'm shown the same respect. It's that simple.

tension_terror2 @ 2006-04-28T15:53:00

2006-04-28T19:53:04Z

Why can't I just do things right?
Maybe I'm not as perfect as you think I am.

tension_terror2 @ 2006-04-25T21:21:00

2006-04-26T01:21:14Z

Bomb threats at my school are COOL

I swear to God, if we get locked down in 1st hour tomorrow, I'm gonna throw a fit.

I hate stupid people.

tension_terror2 @ 2006-04-10T23:58:00

2006-04-11T03:57:58Z

Karissa Baker
4/11/06
5th hour
Turn of the Screw

As the old saying goes, looks can be deceiving. In the novella Turn of the Screw, a supposed confidante betrays her close friend, and seemingly innocent and angelic children drive their caretaker to insanity under the possession of their former servant and governess. Naturally, contradictions to these suggestions exist. Secrets and deception are commonly occurring, and fairly dangerous, themes in this brilliantly written tale.
The governess’ most trusted friend, Mrs. Grose, appears to be in constant alliance with her, while in reality, her loyalty lies with the children, and as a result, their possessors, Quint and Miss Jessel. Mrs. Grose has no reason to favour the governess over the children she has looked after for so long, nor has she any rationale behind exposing her former colleagues. One can assume that Mrs. Grose’s relationship with Miss Jessel would have been similar to the one she pretended to have with the governess. It is therefore conceivable that Mrs. Grose still has a bond with Quint and Miss Jessel, is fully aware of their return, and certainly does not fear them. When the governess first encounters Quint in the window, “…She [Mrs. Grose] faced me again. ‘Do you fear for them?’ We met in another long look. ‘Don’t you?’ Instead of answering she came nearer to the window and, for a minute, applied her face to the glass.” (##) Her lack of an answer confirms the fact early in the novella that she is aware of the ghosts, and does not seem bothered by them. Mrs. Grose’s psuedo-friendship with the governess is fueled by her desire to minimize the importance of the former attendees’ presence. In fact, she seems fairly upset upon discovering the governess’ previously stated meeting with Quint. Mrs. Grose questions the governess with a sense of urgency, as if she is anxious to confirm that the man in the window was certainly Quint, not just a random stranger. At one point in the story, Mrs. Grose openly shows her devotion to the children, Flora in particular. Later in the book, when the pair finds Flora across the lake, Mrs. Grose runs immediately to her. “Mrs. Grose was the first to break the spell: she threw herself on her knees and, drawing the child to her breast, clasped in a long embrace the little tender yielding body.” Flora is obviously comfortable with Mrs. Grose, as she allows herself to be held by a mere bas-menial without complaint or so much as a raised eyebrow. Through all of these events, the governess firmly believes that Mrs. Grose is not capable of her own thoughts, and dumbly agrees with her on every subject. She takes Mrs. Grose’s actions at face value, not seeing the deeper meaning behind them, and is left in a constant state of disillusionment. Quite the contrary, however, is the governess’ thought pattern towards the children.
The tender little children, possessed by the spirits of their previous caretakers, eventually drive their current watcher to insanity, mainly because of their deceiving appearances. The spirits of Quint and Miss Jessel set the new governess all sorts of “traps”, but still allow her to believe that she came to all of the conclusions on her own. They have the children appear as lovely, divine, and nearly perfect beings upon first meeting their governess. But after the first sightings of Quint and Miss Jessel, the governess begins to doubt their perfection. The spirits intensify this thought when, at the lake, Miss Jessel causes Flora to face away from the side of the lake the ghost had appeared at, and forces her to increase the intensity of her play so much that it would attract attention. For long periods of time in between these incidents, the spirits would have the children again seem innocent, tearing the governess’ thoughts in two distinctly opposite directions and causing her to second guess herself. The constant push and pull on her mind eventually wears her down, until she goes completely mad at the end and kills young Miles in an act of desperation. Her insanity is the direct result of relying on outward actions and shallow observations of the children, which of course gave away no hint of their being possessed.
Not all readers are unanimous in thinking this a tale of deception. Some will argue that the children themselves are not possessed, and that the ghosts of Quint and Miss Jessel are merely hallucinations invented by the governess. However, a source from the New York Times disagrees. “A boy of ten years and a girl of eight figure in it prominently, and these are so lovely in their outward semblance of childlike innocence, so charming in their natural dispositions... Yet these children are accursed, or all but damned, and are shown to have daily, almost hourly, communication with lost souls, the souls that formerly inhabited the bodies of a vicious governess and her paramour, who, in the flesh, began the degradation of their victims.” Others also argue that although Mrs. Grose cared for the children, the point was never made clear as to whether Mrs. Grose had previous knowledge of the ghosts presence or not. The assumption is always made that Mrs. Grose is too dumb to know what she believes and only follows what the governess says. However, at an early point in the novella, for just a brief second, the governess states otherwise.
“Mrs. Grose’s large face showed me, at this, for the first time, the far-away
faint glimmer of a consciousness more acute: I somehow made out in it the
delayed dawn of an idea I myself had not given her and that was as yet quite
obscure to me.” (##)
Apparently, Mrs. Grose has pieced together the ghosts reappearance on her own, a clear sign that she was fully aware of their existence. A final argument brings about the point that for a governess to believe in all of these sham relationships and to lack the ability to see through the children’s charades of good behavior, she would have to be unintelligent, and no person in their right mind would hire an unintelligent person to teach their young. This argument would be valid, were there only one type of intelligence. The governess is by no means stupid. She has great knowledge of books and historical happenings, but her social intelligence is minimal at best due to her lack of human interaction and sheltered social life.
The end results of the lies, trickery, and deceit displayed in Turn of the Screw were insanity on the part of the governess and the death of a child. Mrs. Grose’s feigned support and friendship aided in driving the poor governess insane, a movement headed by the malicious spirits’ cruel use of the children as their puppets. Deception and misguided assumptions often end tragically, in this chilling tale, as well as in the lives of everyday men.

tension_terror2 @ 2006-03-29T17:27:00

2006-03-29T22:29:20Z

Normal life. Wake up, go to school, maybe head to a movie. Boring.

But I have a job now. Babysitting a 9 year old boy and a 7-year-old girl. They're pretty cool I guess, just a little hyper sometimes. But I'm watching them pretty much every day at about $5 per hour, but I get payed when their mom gets home, so it's kind of a constant flow of money.

And in case anyone cares: I got a 99% on my Advanced Algebra quiz. And I'm proud.